The Myth about Divorce Revealed
“Lived Happily After the Divorce” – The Myth about Divorce Revealed
First myth about divorce: Second marriages are usually more successful than the first.
It is believed that the divorced partners gain experience from their first failed marriage and would not repeat their initial mistakes. Most often it happens that the reason that they had as a main reason for divorce at the first marriage is also the cause for separation in the second. Of course, there are many people who still manage to cope with the challenges of the second marriage to build successful relationship, but the facts remain – the possibility of divorce in a second marriage is actually higher than in the first.
Second myth about divorce: When you live together before marriage you will reduce the possibility of eventual divorce, because you will get to know each other better. Studies show that couples living outside of a legal marriage have a significantly higher risk of separation. It is difficult to identify the exact causes of these facts, but most likely it comes to the value system of these couples – their understanding of relationships is that they are something temporary that can be easily terminated. It turns out also that people who tend to avoid marriage are the same people who are willing to get divorced.
Third myth about divorce: Divorce does not have great consequences on the psyche of children – usually the problems are resolved after some time. Itturns out that the real consequences of divorce are manifested in adulthood. According to research the effects of divorce are long lasting, and in some cases – fatal for the child’s psyche.
Forth myth about divorce: If a couple has children, this will reduce the risk of divorce.
Many couples stay together because of the children in order not to hurt them and they don’t even try to resolve their conflicts. In fact, one of the most difficult periods in the curve of development of a family is precisely the period after birth of the first child. Indeed, it appears that couples having a child / children have a lower risk of divorce. However, at the moment when the child grows up and leaves the home, they got divorced immediately. In a recent study it was found that the crisis in marriage affects the mental well-being of children and affects nearly every dimension of life. In carrying out a further examination of the negative influences in children’s lives is found that divorce was a positive influence for children of families with a high degree of conflict and violence. In marriages with a lower level of conflict that ended in divorce (two thirds of the surveyed divorces), proved that the consequences for children coming from these families are much more serious than children of previous described group.
Fifth myth about divorce: Kids with divorced parents have a greater probability of a happy marriage in adulthood than children coming from stable families.
This is absolutely wrong! Marriages of children whose parents were divorced, have a much higher chance to end the same way, being compared to children coming from stable families. The main reason for this (made at the conclusion of huge studies) is that children learn to marital devotion and loyalty by the example, given by their parents. Children of divorced parents have a low sense of commitment to marriage and to partner.
Sixth myth about divorce: Kids of divorced parents feel much better if the lone parent remarries.
There is solid evidence that there are no improvements to the welfare of children after the parent married again, even with increasing incomes and the presence of the father in the home. Second marriages are involved in specific issues related to interpersonal conflicts with new parent with a very high risk of repeated divorce.
Seventh myth about divorce: Misunderstanding in marriage is a sign of divorce.
It is completely wrong perception – all marriages have conflicts, and those that do not, are at a greater risk of divorce.